All the smells of fall have started me thinking about the way smells brings with them a host of memories. I love the  fall and memories that come with the  smell of cookies, of sharpened pencils, of new books, pumpkin bread, simmering soups, morning dew, so many memories of my life are tied up in these simple smells.

I have started making fresh bread in my bread machine again. Pure delicious no preservative wheat bread. Oh my goodness when it starts baking we are delighted with the warm homey delicious smell. I wish that fragrance would linger forever in my home.

This morning as I eat my toast and peanut butter for breakfast my heart was struck with the memories of  a precious lesson God taught me when my sons were small. The smell of the fresh bread lifted the memory out of my mind as the aroma permeates my home.

I had just become a believer in Jesus when my youngest was a toddler, I was 33 years old and I was very aware of my lack as a Mom. I wanted to bring up my sons in the way they should go like scripture said, but this young Mom was not even able to walk in that way herself. I felt years behind and like there was no way to catch up. I struggled with a sense of hopeless defeat. I knew I didn’t want to give my sons the same start that I had, but I was not even aware of all that was wrong nor how to correct what I was aware of.

I began to move towards a quiet time everyday, to enter into some very timid prayers out of desperation, not fully aware that the LORD would hear me much less care to answer.  I just knew I was without hope if He didn’t, because this girl was a mess.

I bought my first bible and in the few moments early in the morning began to venture onto that path that I hoped would lead me to know Him and learn to walk in the Way I should go. I began to risk more and more, seeking him for answers on how to teach, discipline, encourage, and create life with these two young boys I loved with all my heart.

One day as I drove down 98th street the boys were fighting in the back seat of the car, my knee jerk response was to pull the car over and spank them or turn the car around and go home. I didn’t want to live by knee jerks any longer I wanted to live guided by the Holy Spirit. So I silently sought ‘HELP.’  In one of those precious moments when the Voice of God permeates through your mind unseen like the smells of fresh bread  can permeate your home. I heard Him, not audible but I did hear Wisdom give me what I needed.

I heard the Lord talk to me about Fresh Bread. He shared the thoughts about my Mom serving her children the only bread she had, even though the bread she had was old and stale and even had mold on it. I didn’t want to feed my son’s old, stale, moldy bread, but it was all I had because it was all I had been given. I couldn’t give something that I had not received. He went on to share with me that HE was the  ”BREAD of LIFE” fresh life giving bread. If I would continue to come to Him DAILY He would give me fresh bread to give my sons. Daily was the highlighted word, because like bread baked at home that has no preservatives and will go bad quickly, His life was always fresh and it was for that day. Oh how this made so much sense after reading the scriptures talking about the Manna in the wilderness being just enough for that day in Exodus, and Jesus saying , ” I Am the BREAD of Life,” and the LORD’s Prayer asking ” Give us this day our Daily Bread” in  Matthew 6:11.  I wanted Emotional, Spiritual, and Wise  FRESH BREAD to give my children, I wanted it DAILY.

There are few smells that delight my soul as much as the smell of Fresh Bread baking in the oven. There is nothing better than dining on hot fresh bread and yes real butter. But, there is NOTHING in this world that sustains, leads, makes us wise, or gives us life than the bread that comes from time in HIS Presence, reading scripture, listening to our hearts next to HIS heart, receiving the BREAD Of LIFE.

Yet to all who did receive him, to those who believed in his name, he gave the right to become children of God—Jn1:12

Tanya

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